My eyes. MY EYES.
Set your alarm approximately 1.5 hours early, so that you can perform your delicate lens-to-eyeball insertions uninterrupted.
Marvel / giphy.com
Wash your hands with the thoroughness of an overly-thorough surgeon.
Getting bacteria in your eye is a no-no, but even trace amounts of soap will STING like a BITCH.
Remove your glasses.
Gaze blearily at the undefined world around you and consider how long you would have survived in prehistoric times with eyesight this bad.
Briefly fail to recognise your own blurry reflection.
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