Tuesday, January 27, 2015

17 Football Terms That Mean Something Different To Gay Guys

But “slobberknocker” is the same in every language.


Down


Down


Literal definition: A period of action that starts when the ball is put into play and ends when the ball is ruled dead.


Matt Ortile: Alternative for "bottom." Like, I'm down to down.

Ira Madison III: A masc top's go-to phrase. "Go DOWN on me. Put your ass DOWN."

Matt: Like "Down It Low by Christina Millian feat. Sam Smith."


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End Zone


End Zone


Literal definition: A 10-yard-long area at both ends of the field.


Ira: I know this one, it's where you score touchdowns. I'm from Milwaukee so I sometimes watch Packers games to not feel like a traitor and also because Aaron Rodgers is hot.

Matt: I only know the other kind of "packers."

Ira: SMDH.

Matt: Is there a start zone?

Ira: No, I think there's just the rest of the field.

Matt: So there's an ending but no beginning? Typical straight men.


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Extra Point


Extra Point


Literal definition: A kick, worth one point, that's typically attempted after every touchdown.


Matt: When he eats ass.

Ira: Shouldn't that be a requirement these days? If straight people are co-opting it, then we have a duty to uphold

Matt: So it's just a point.

Ira: An extra point for not being a general asshole on Grindr, Scruff, Tinder, at a bar, Twitter, in general.

Matt: I like how it's apps > IRL > twitter thirst for you.


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Interception


Interception


Literal definition: A pass that's caught by a defensive player, ending the offense's possession of the ball.


Matt: The sequel to Inception.

Ira: Cockblocking.

Matt: Same thing.

Ira: Look at this Chris Nolan shade! I got dragged on BuzzFeed for shading Interstellar, so good luck.

Matt: I can take the heat from Tumblr.


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